Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Filling In For Me, My Sister.

Since I had to help Mom put some stuff between the things she put down in the entryway, I thought I'd turn this over to Olivia the little piglet eating machine tonight. So here she is.

Olivia's Rules Of Engagement.
By Olivia
1. If you pet me and I'm not in the mood, I will bite you.
2. If you pet me and I am in the mood, I will bite you.
3. If I want to get into the closet and you make me leave, I will bite you.
4. If you feed me something I don't want, I will bite you.
5. If you feed me something I do want, I will bite you.
6. When you come in from hunting and greet me with trills like I do to you, I may purr but I will also bite you.
7. When you go out to hunt and try to say goodbye with trills like I do to you, I will probably not purr and I will also bite you.
8. Just because I eat all the time does not give you the right to call me Olivia the little piglet eating machine, even if you are my mom, and I will bite you. That goes for you, too, William.
9. Just because when I had my operation and the doctor put in sponges, a kangaroo or sea monkeys, that certainly does not give you the right to make fun of my plush tummy. I do have a kangaroo in me and I will bite you. Or maybe it is sea monkeys. I will bite you anyway.
10. Even though I like to snuggle with you and nap with you and love you, I will still bite you. Always.

Olivia


Don't talk to me.
Or I'll bite you.
 Posted by Hello

9 comments:

  1. Do I detect a hint of bitterness?

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  2. i'm kinda like that too Olivia - the dr. says that i'm "easily over-stimulated" - i don't know what that means, so i bit her . . .

    ya gotta show your mom that sometimes they are "love bites"!

    meep

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  3. Everybody? This is what my mom calls BSL--Biting as a Second Language.

    My brother and I never bite!

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  4. It's good to be consistent ~Merlin, Shadow, Ko Ko

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  5. Dude. Olivia sounds like she's got pms or somethin'... I'm steering clear of her!

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  6. I've wondered what Wm meant about your kangaroo. I think I gots one, too.

    And as for biting, I'm with you, sisfur! Why would beans have such soft skin if it wasn't for us to bite? How else will we maintain our control over them?

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  7. Oh my goodness, William: Olivia and Isis were separated at birth! They're practically the same! Maybe we should do some investigative work on this to see if it's true! :)

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Wowee meowee.