Thirty Minutes Late and Then a Cockroach.

Eddie here. I'm the wise and mature one. I think William needs to think about his behavior tonight instead of talking about birds.

Well, the day started late when my mom's radio alarm went off but the station was off the air. Thirty minutes of static later she finally woke up and realized what was going on. She got all worried since there didn't seem to be any stations on that end of the dial and she doesn't do well listening to stupid AM radio just to find out if the country's under attack by those red states or terrorists or something. It was a little after that when she went into our bathroom and found another of my brother's pests on the floor, which also did not thrill her. Even though William had dispatched the thing by chasing it under a scatter rug and pouncing on it until it was dead, she was not happy. The fourth one in two weeks!

I used to be rambunctious–that was my middle name. But William is way more rambunctious than I ever was. Remember a few days ago when he mentioned that he and Olivia were playing under the vanity and knocked off the drain pipe? Well, my mom hates plumbing more than electrical work, and no matter how many times she measures and how many drain bits she buys at Lowe's, NONE OF THESE THINGS FIT. So after cursing at it for about an hour and a half right after it happened and not getting the pipe reattached, she settled on resting the smaller pipe in the part that comes out of the wall and planned on trying to get yet more drain bits from Lowe's. Needless to say she also turned off the water for the sink since there's no telling if WMD and his little charge would "accidentally" move the handles on the faucet. They are levers, after all–no thumbs needed.

So tonight she decided to try the newest drain bits and of course they were the wrong size. Then we all heard kind of a scream. I thought it might be stupid AM radio again, since she does yell at that. But it was the coffee can under the drain pipe that did it. It had bugs in it, actual live bugs, and not something edible like moths or flies, no. You may not know this, but Albuquerque may be the only place in the country that actually has a cockroach hotline! Is that enough to make you hork up a hairball or ten or what? You can call the city and they'll come and spray storm drains and the water lines under the street. I guess you could say we have a small problem with roaches.

Anyway, we never had any in the house until WMD pulled his little stunt. Mom finally realized THEY WERE COMING. IN. THROUGH. THE. DRAIN. She has jammed a rag into the gross and disgusting roach source and hopefully I won't have to call the hotline. It's also a really good thing she put that cat-proof latch on the vanity door.

Little cats!

–Edw.